I think, perhaps the most annoying part of the de-conversion process, is dealing with people who, can not seem to fathom or accept the notion that you have been where they are. Something must have "happened" to you. It is incomprehensible and simply cannot be true that de-conversion, is derived from personal growth. Yep! It all started with one simple question and one personal choice. Why do I believe what I believe? And the willingness to pursue that question even to uncomfortable and unpopular ends. It really make you wonder how many people are silently living lives of quiet desperation, going through the motions for the sake of friends and family.
As a minister's son, ex-theist, and philosophy instructor the most annoying thing to me is when people accuse me of rejecting Christianity out of childish reaction (ad hominem attack) and then go one to claim that they're a believer because it's the way they were raised (appeal to tradition).
It happens the other way too. A good friend of mine came from a family ranging from secular to mildly religious. Over the years many of them became fundamentalist Christians.
He never changed; they did. But eventually he was the outsider, rejecting the free gift of grace, etc., etc. He's really a nice guy, just trying to get by like everyone else. But over the years he's lost much of his family to fundamentalism, and other than a blood relation they no longer have anything to talk about. He would be happy to talk to them, but they are now in a religious fantasy land, and are unable to relate to him except as an object to be converted to their way of thinking.
As they say, the Lord works in mysterious ways, and I guess the occasional destruction of a family is one of those ways.
What I do not understand is, Why in the 21st century, there is no one taking a bold public stance against Christianity, I mean basically it's teachings and it's origins are not even questioned, publically. It's being presently taught in colleges as absolute fact and offering degrees in ancient falsehood myths?
No one even questions how the Bible made it's way over here to America, most people presume that the Bible has always been here in America, and most people think it was brought over here with god's holy graces, so that America could be the christian representive of the bible god for all the world to see and adore.
IMO, I believe that Madelyn Ohara put the word Atheism in such a bad light, that people shun the word Atheism. I also think that Madelyn Ohara believed that a Bible god existed for her to actually hate.
I remember hearing people talk about her like she was lower than dog vomit, especially the Christians despised her, she was a huge threat to Christianity, but now, nothing appears to be a threat to Christianity.
There has to be a way to politely put an end to ancient falsehood myths.
It is a little different for me, but almost as difficult. My father was agnostic and my mother claimed to be a Christian, but regularly voiced her doubts to me. I did not go to church at all as a child and was basically agnostic until about a year ago, when I began calling myself an Atheist. The rest of my family is Christian. Today, as an Atheist, when the topic of my Atheism comes up with anyone in my family, they dismiss anything I say and say that it is my parents fault for not sending me to church as a child; or that my interpretation of the Bible is related to the way I was raised (in a secular environment). They do not bother to listen to any of my explanations for why I feel the way I do. At the same time, my family is correct that the way I was raised has influenced my becoming an atheist; it’s called not being brain-washed and I will always thank my parents and my lucky stars for it.
I was raised in a fairly undogmatic Catholic home, became born-again as a teenager, and gave it up after a little more than two years. Since then, I have been fairly agnostic although I am quite comfortable with the Christianity of John Shelby Spong. Although the experience was emotionally wrenching, there was no social stigma attached to my deconversion since my family and friends had found me pretty annoying as a believer.
It is hard for me to imagine how it must feel to have not chosen to believe in the first place and then to have the choice of non-belief denied as well.
It is a little different for me, but almost as difficult. My father was agnostic and my mother claimed to be a Christian, but regularly voiced her doubts to me. I did not go to church at all as a child and was basically agnostic until about a year ago, when I began calling myself an Atheist. The rest of my family is Christian. Today, as an Atheist, when the topic of my Atheism comes up with anyone in my family, they dismiss anything I say and say that it is my parents fault for not sending me to church as a child; or that my interpretation of the Bible is related to the way I was raised (in a secular environment). They do not bother to listen to any of my explanations for why I feel the way I do. At the same time, my family is correct that the way I was raised has influenced my becoming an atheist; it’s called not being brain-washed and I will always thank my parents and my lucky stars for it.
Religion's hold on us as people, society and culture is due, I think for the most part, because we are immersed from our birth in its centrality to everything that we perceive and believe as normal. Religion is a tapestry, a fabric woven into the soul of our perception of what it means to be human, ethical and whole. For those who do not dare to question what they believe, it is incomprehensible that anyone would. For those who relentlessly in pursue truth at all cost, who finally stand outside religions grasp, looking back is tantamount to reading Plato's, "Myth of the cave" for the first time and understanding the liberation and fear of freedom.
I thought it was going to happen to me, too. My fundie mom was horrified and scared. My Presbyterian-elder dad scoffed and said hurtful things.
Then Mom died. I went to her funeral, well-attended by her fundie friends and her Jewish family (she had converted). At the gathering at Grandma's afterward, her friends finally got on my last nerve with their sick fundie fawning, and I told them where to stick it.
Grandma came up to me afterward and confessed to me that she had allowed Mom to "convert" her just so Mom would feel better in her last day. I said, jokingly, "Only a lousy atheist would do something like that." And she laughed and admitted that she was.
After the friends left, the family gathered around and told me all about how worried they were that my mother's kids would grow up brainwashed into religion. One of my cousins took me out for dinner to celebrate. It almost felt like the bas mitzvah I missed as a kid. LOL...
I emailed a whole bunch of people a letter in 2007 explaining why I didn't believe in God. Then my mother called me up and threatened to disown me. Fundamentalist religions such as Christianity and Islam are dangerous. If a person believes that anyone who doesn't believe in his or her religion is going to Hell, then he or she must protect his or her family from non believers. This may involve disowning family members who try to expose unconfirmable beliefs. The crusades and the inquisition came about because of these beliefs. And if we are not careful, these beliefs may end up destroying humanity.
11 comments:
I think, perhaps the most annoying part of the de-conversion process, is dealing with people who, can not seem to fathom or accept the notion that you have been where they are. Something must have "happened" to you. It is incomprehensible and simply cannot be true that de-conversion, is derived from personal growth.
Yep! It all started with one simple question and one personal choice. Why do I believe what I believe? And the willingness to pursue that question even to uncomfortable and unpopular ends.
It really make you wonder how many people are silently living lives of quiet desperation, going through the motions for the sake of friends and family.
As a minister's son, ex-theist, and philosophy instructor the most annoying thing to me is when people accuse me of rejecting Christianity out of childish reaction (ad hominem attack) and then go one to claim that they're a believer because it's the way they were raised (appeal to tradition).
It happens the other way too. A good friend of mine came from a family ranging from secular to mildly religious. Over the years many of them became fundamentalist Christians.
He never changed; they did. But eventually he was the outsider, rejecting the free gift of grace, etc., etc. He's really a nice guy, just trying to get by like everyone else. But over the years he's lost much of his family to fundamentalism, and other than a blood relation they no longer have anything to talk about. He would be happy to talk to them, but they are now in a religious fantasy land, and are unable to relate to him except as an object to be converted to their way of thinking.
As they say, the Lord works in mysterious ways, and I guess the occasional destruction of a family is one of those ways.
What I do not understand is, Why in the 21st century, there is no one taking a bold public stance against Christianity, I mean basically it's teachings and it's origins are not even questioned, publically. It's being presently taught in colleges as absolute fact and offering degrees in ancient falsehood myths?
No one even questions how the Bible made it's way over here to America, most people presume that the Bible has always been here in America, and most people think it was brought over here with god's holy graces, so that America could be the christian representive of the bible god for all the world to see and adore.
IMO, I believe that Madelyn Ohara put the word Atheism in such a bad light, that people shun the word Atheism. I also think that Madelyn Ohara believed that a Bible god existed for her to actually hate.
I remember hearing people talk about her like she was lower than dog vomit, especially the Christians despised her, she was a huge threat to Christianity, but now, nothing appears to be a threat to Christianity.
There has to be a way to politely put an end to ancient falsehood myths.
It is a little different for me, but almost as difficult. My father was agnostic and my mother claimed to be a Christian, but regularly voiced her doubts to me. I did not go to church at all as a child and was basically agnostic until about a year ago, when I began calling myself an Atheist. The rest of my family is Christian. Today, as an Atheist, when the topic of my Atheism comes up with anyone in my family, they dismiss anything I say and say that it is my parents fault for not sending me to church as a child; or that my interpretation of the Bible is related to the way I was raised (in a secular environment). They do not bother to listen to any of my explanations for why I feel the way I do. At the same time, my family is correct that the way I was raised has influenced my becoming an atheist; it’s called not being brain-washed and I will always thank my parents and my lucky stars for it.
I was raised in a fairly undogmatic Catholic home, became born-again as a teenager, and gave it up after a little more than two years. Since then, I have been fairly agnostic although I am quite comfortable with the Christianity of John Shelby Spong. Although the experience was emotionally wrenching, there was no social stigma attached to my deconversion since my family and friends had found me pretty annoying as a believer.
It is hard for me to imagine how it must feel to have not chosen to believe in the first place and then to have the choice of non-belief denied as well.
you must be living in a fantasy world
It is a little different for me, but almost as difficult. My father was agnostic and my mother claimed to be a Christian, but regularly voiced her doubts to me. I did not go to church at all as a child and was basically agnostic until about a year ago, when I began calling myself an Atheist. The rest of my family is Christian. Today, as an Atheist, when the topic of my Atheism comes up with anyone in my family, they dismiss anything I say and say that it is my parents fault for not sending me to church as a child; or that my interpretation of the Bible is related to the way I was raised (in a secular environment). They do not bother to listen to any of my explanations for why I feel the way I do. At the same time, my family is correct that the way I was raised has influenced my becoming an atheist; it’s called not being brain-washed and I will always thank my parents and my lucky stars for it.
Religion's hold on us as people, society and culture is due, I think for the most part, because we are immersed from our birth in its centrality to everything that we perceive and believe as normal. Religion is a tapestry, a fabric woven into the soul of our perception of what it means to be human, ethical and whole. For those who do not dare to question what they believe, it is incomprehensible that anyone would. For those who relentlessly in pursue truth at all cost, who finally stand outside religions grasp, looking back is tantamount to reading Plato's, "Myth of the cave" for the first time and understanding the liberation and fear of freedom.
I thought it was going to happen to me, too. My fundie mom was horrified and scared. My Presbyterian-elder dad scoffed and said hurtful things.
Then Mom died. I went to her funeral, well-attended by her fundie friends and her Jewish family (she had converted). At the gathering at Grandma's afterward, her friends finally got on my last nerve with their sick fundie fawning, and I told them where to stick it.
Grandma came up to me afterward and confessed to me that she had allowed Mom to "convert" her just so Mom would feel better in her last day. I said, jokingly, "Only a lousy atheist would do something like that." And she laughed and admitted that she was.
After the friends left, the family gathered around and told me all about how worried they were that my mother's kids would grow up brainwashed into religion. One of my cousins took me out for dinner to celebrate. It almost felt like the bas mitzvah I missed as a kid. LOL...
I emailed a whole bunch of people a letter in 2007 explaining why I didn't believe in God. Then my mother called me up and threatened to disown me. Fundamentalist religions such as Christianity and Islam are dangerous. If a person believes that anyone who doesn't believe in his or her religion is going to Hell, then he or she must protect his or her family from non believers. This may involve disowning family members who try to expose unconfirmable beliefs. The crusades and the inquisition came about because of these beliefs. And if we are not careful, these beliefs may end up destroying humanity.
Post a Comment