God Was There

Joe Holman, a former preacher and team member here at DC, recently wrote some sarcasm which I think is pretty damn funny. Check it out:
I am God. I know your pain.
I was there for every trial you’ve ever faced.

I was there when you fell and hurt your knee at the age of three.
I was there when you were shunned on the playground more recently.
I was there when your mother was in the hospital. I stood by and watched as the doctors worked to save her life. I appreciated the prayers you sent Me to spare her.

I was there when mother died, as her immortal spirit drifted back to Me.
I was there when your family mourned her loss and cried with unceasing tears.
I was there when your father passed, when he forgot who you were, when you closed the lid to his casket.

I was there when dear Aunt Olga was diagnosed with ovarian cancer.
I was there when she bravely went through test after test until her condition was finally confirmed.
I was there when she lost her will to live. I watched as the family pleaded with her to continue treatment and not to give up; I waited where her tears fell.

I was there when your Uncle Hank died.
I was there when you told your first lie.
I was [there] around the first time you touched yourself; on that day, all the angels cried; on that day, you lost your innocence.

I was there, in the corner of your room, watching you sin. I testified to your inner-man that you fell short of My Glory, as a sinner, an impure and fallen man, another of Adam’s reproachful sons, wicked from birth.

I was there when young Ben, your childhood friend, was killed in the car wreck.
I was in the driver’s seat of the other car, watching, looking on as a drunken man fell asleep at the wheel. I did not wake him, but said: “Sleep, you foolish man. Sleep.”

I was there when your best friend from high school decided to take his own life. My holy eyes saw the blood from his slit wrists run down through the cracks of the hard wood floor.
I was there when you wept at his funeral. Jesus wept too.
I was there when you sobbed uncontrollably, leaning on the casket of your bosom friend, pushing away the comforts of your spouse.

I was there when your youngest child was born, when it was said of the doctors: “Your son’s spine did not form correctly. He will never walk and will need surgery to live.”
I was there when the doctors performed the operation.
I was there as their hands took the scalpels, as every incision, every cut into his newborn flesh was made.

I was there, and I am here. I am God: “and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.” (Matthew 28:20)

Link to Joe Holman


Double A said...


He was there through all that, and you are OK. He loves you.

Lyvvie said...

But he didn't care. Love is kind of useless when you don't care about those you love.

busterggi said...

So just wait would a god get out of watching me on the toilet?

Unknown said...

Hello Debunking Christianity: Its been a long time since I graced the blog with my scribblings. Yet, I often find myself lurking and reading. I break my accustomed silence to chime in on this silly notion that the Christian God fantasy could be capable of love. The following is apropos to this topic and though I've posted this stuff before the credit is due to Dawson Bethrick of the Incinerating Presuppositionalism blog. Consider:

Any attributable quality assigned to the alleged Deity would necessarily have to be a metaphysical primary. Love or feeling humans are special in any way are human emotions and not metaphysical primary qualities. They follows from the assignment of value to the love object. Only beings that exist within nature with definite attributes have needs and values. The hypothetical Deity in question is logically incapable of valuing anything as it is allegedly an eternal, infinite, perfect, indestructible, self-sufficient, self-contained, complete being which lacks nothing. If it did exist, it would not act in the interest of a goal. It would have no basis for goal-setting whatsoever. It would, if it existed, always be what it is, nothing could change it, nothing could harm it, nothing could threaten it, nothing could deprive it, nothing could be of any of value to it, for nothing could benefit it. It would be incapable of valuing anything, and thus it would be incapable of love or assigning the value "special" to Humanity or of acting to personally value a Homo Sapien. If the Christian GOD existed, it could do nothing for any action would diminish its perfection and perturb its sufficiency. If YAHWEH/THEOS/JESUS existed it could not love, nor could it be love as love is simply a human emotion that comes from assigning value to something that is needed or desired.

The fantasy of GOD can love, because the person fantasying GOD can love. If GOD were real, however, it would not love because I'd could not love.

Cheers and Best Regards

Joshua Jung said...

The irony is rich yet sublime. Nice post!

Double A said...

Bumbalough's post definitely makes sense for non-beleivers. That is the true irony.