What Contrary Evidence Troubles Me?

Davis Marshall asked me three questions:
What existentially difficult questions do you even admit face you, as an atheist? What contrary evidence troubles your confidence? Do you dare confess?
Let me take the last one first. I think he is probably "projecting" onto me. That line of psychological reasoning goes like this: "Since I have secret doubts then John probably does too." I'm not presuming to know this about him, but I suspect it's true. Perhaps he'll say that having doubts is a good thing, since he could claim it to be a mark of an open-minded person. Nonetheless, I have no trouble telling people what I think. He knows this. Perhaps that's why he asked. But he envisions me secretly fearing hell, worrying that if I am wrong I'm doomed, or worrying whether I'm doing a good thing by arguing against Christian faith, or that I hide some facts that support faith whenever it's inconvenient to do so. So in obliging his request what follows isn't a confession. I have no secret or hidden questions so there is nothing to "confess." This doesn't mean I know everything. I am continually learning as I go, and I have a lot of unresolved questions about the Bible, theology, and the history of the church. I have a lot of philosophical questions, the kinds that science can solve in principle, if not outright. I have questions about whether there will ever be a grand unified theory of everything, concerning the ultimate origins of everything, of human self-awareness and consciousness, and questions about metaphysical free-will, and the nature of ethics. They all interest me but they are not my specialty.

Existential questions?

I wrestle with death, I don't like it. I hate it. I know it's coming though. How will I die? I want to live forever. I worry a lot. I fret. I'd like some divine guidance and comfort here and now. But there isn't any available. If some kind of supernatural being exists he's silent. I wonder quite a bit too. What will life be like after I'm gone? What will the area where I live look like in 50 years? What will become of my kids and grandkids? What will become of the nations, religion, or earth itself? I'd like to see it all, but I won't. Because there is no life after death. When the brain ceases functioning I will cease to exist. I will go to the same place that all animal life goes when it dies since I am an animal, a Homosapien.

Contrary evidence?

Everything I have experienced and learned in life has shown me that there is no reason to believe anything. With faith as a basis anything can be believed. Faith has no method. It solves no problems. As best as humanly possible I think exclusively in terms of probabilities when it comes to questions about the origins of existence and of gods and goddesses, miracles and holy "inspired" books. Faith adds nothing to these probabilities. Remember, my claim is merely that Christianity is false, along with every religion that is based on faith. There is therefore no contrary evidence that troubles me at all, precisely because I think exclusively in terms of probabilities. I adjust what I think to the evidence, scientific evidence. The only people who have trouble with contrary evidence are people of faith, because faith is an irrational leap over the probabilities.