I'm Back On the Marriage Market

I've married plenty of women in my days. No I'm not a polygamist. I've performed many weddings. I never thought I'd do so again even though I've been asked more than a dozen times, and turned them all down. Until tonight. For as a newly ordained minister with the First Church of Atheism I'm conducting my first wedding in years. If anyone would like me to perform your wedding just contact me and I'll get the job done without the religious mumbo jumbo. For a secular humanism church I'm also a minister with the Universal Life Church whose only creed is an "adherence to the universal doctrine of religious freedom: 'Do only that which is right.'"

I'll also do atheist funerals with dignity and respect for those who have lost loved ones without the religious mumbo jumbo.